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The 90-10 Secret
The 90-10 secret is incredible! However, very few know and apply this secret. The result? Millions of people are suffering undeserved stress, trials, problems, and heartache. They never seem to be a success in life or enjoy life. Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. Stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships are like a smothering blanket. Worry consumes time, anger breaks friendships, and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest. Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged. You can be different. Understand and apply the 90-10 secret. It will change your life! This is the secret: 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react to the other 10%. Let me explain. We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane may be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. You get the picture. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%! How? By your reaction. You cannot control a red light, but you can control your reaction. Don't let people fool you, YOU can control how you react! Look at the following example. You're eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee on to your business shirt. You have no control over what just happened. What happens next will be determined by how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the coffee cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her you turn to your spouse and criticize them for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for an errand. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 mph in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15 minute delay and throwing $60 away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs to the building without saying good-bye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to going home. When you arrive home, you find a small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter. This caps off a terrible day. Why did you have a bad day? _ A) Did the coffee cause it? B) Did your daughter cause it? C) Did the policeman cause it? D) Did you cause it? The answer is "D". You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, "It's OK honey, you just need to be more careful next time." Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After slipping on a new shirt and taking your briefcase, you come back down in time look through the window and see your daughter getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You and your spouse kiss before you both go to work. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good of a day you are having. Notice the difference? There were two totally different scenarios. Both started the same, but both ended different. Why? Because of how you reacted. You now know the 90-10 secret. Use it and take control of your life. Don't focus on the 10% you can't change but focus on the 90% you can change. (C) Arlen Busenitz. Arlen is the author of "Conversation Magic: 7 Keys to Unlock your Ability to Conquer Shyness, Make Friends, and Confidently Talk with Anyone." Free tips and articles here: http://www.conversation-tips.com/90-10
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